Money Self Esteem During Divorce

divorce money The divorce process was not made with your self esteem in mind. It is a legal proceeding that is usually run by solicitors who are not emotionally involved and do their job using everything at their disposal. The other thing to think about if you are in the midst of the divorce process is the fact that it is all about getting you a legal settlement not what happens after that settlement.

With your attorneys you go to war to win a mighty war, there are many battles along the way which leave you tired and hurt; then after many months and sometimes years you may or may not win your war but everyone has done their part and you are left alone to rebuild your life.

The day after the last paper is signed or stamped by the court you are alone to start a new life. If your divorce has been rough and you have put all your effort into it then you may find yourself not knowing what your next step is or how you are going to take it.

The best thing to do is to have some idea of what it is you want in your life that will make you happy and give you satisfaction and passion.

The Ability to Make An Income

One of the greatest fears that comes with divorce is the fear of not being able to earn enough to live the way you want. This fear is particularly rife with spouses, both female and male, who have been the stay at home figure and have not pursued a career. This fear causes many people to fight tooth and nail for every cent they can get from their divorce.

The trouble is it is not going to be enough in most cases to bring in enough money for daily, weekly or monthly bills.

If you are one of the many people going through divorce that does not have the ability to make an income that covers all the costs then start to think about it now. You will need to retrain, buy a small business, take a second job or down size your needs.

Spousal Maintenance

Fighting for spousal maintenance is one way to cover this fear of not having enough income. The default on spousal maintenance is 50%, ex-spouses do not like having to look after ex-spouses, they want to rebuild their own lives, which is difficult when they have to give up some of their own income and be reminded monthly of the marriage that didn’t survive.

So you should view spousal support as extra but do not rely on it.

What Are The Options?

Deciding on a career path at an age when you thought you wouldn’t need to can be daunting. There are specialists in the community to help you with this. Career counselors are not just for school children so make an appointment with one and sit down to discuss with an expert the type of career you could possibly pick.

Extra Income From Home

You may need extra income but do not want to leave your home because your children are small or you already have another job. There are many jobs you can do at home these days. As the internet becomes more a part of the way business is run, there are a lot of out sourced jobs that big companies now pay people to do. There are also many home based businesses to run on the internet. Be careful when looking for one of these, and remember the old saying ‘if it sounds to good to be true then it probably is’ All profitable businesses take work so be wary of the ones that promise big money for little input. Either the person has done the hard yards and is now able to put in a small amount of time or they are just trying to turn a profit.

Second Job

This is an easy option if you have a profession where you can take on extra work or you can have small accounts you can handle privately. Most people don’t so a second job can become very difficult when there are children who need to be looked after. Timing your second job is critical to being able to keep it up, if you are constantly late or over whelmed it will become to much and the extra income will not seem worth it.

The trouble with the second job is it does not usually apply itself to the problem of creating an income stream that will get you moving ahead, it is more a band aid for the money worries of today. So when contemplating getting a second job think about where you would like to work, which field or new area, and try to get a job in that to start to learn and make some extra.

Going Back Into The Workforce

Going back into the work force can be extremely frightening for those who have not been in it for a long while. The fear that you will not be able to earn enough income for yourself or support your family can stop you in your tracks. You are not alone with these fears so if you need to find others to talk to about this.

Finding the right job may be difficult as you may not have the skills necessary for work you may have once done. There are options, get retrained, find something you can do or decide to do something different.

Remember when you are reentering the work force you are bringing with you a myriad of experience from managing people and time. These skills come from running a home and making a family work so do not feel you are without skills. It is time society changes its views on the skills needed to run families and raise children, the courts see these as skills and so should the work market.