Simple Divorce Advice

If you are going through a divorce and feel out of your depth there are a few simple ways to make life a lot easier. The persona you present to the world goes a long way to how people treat you. Is this fair or right, probably not but it is true. If you present as self assured and in control that is how you will be treated. If you present as a scared little mouse you will be trod on. And if you present as an out of control aggressive asshole people will be put off big time.

The way we present is usually to do with how we are feeling. Our emotions cover not only our mood but also our demeanor. Learning to overcome this and present how you want others to see you is not difficult. Follow the below rules and see the difference.

1. Before you have a meeting of any kind, write a list of what you want to achieve. Know your outcomes, the ones you would like to achieve, not the ones you necessarily will. By having a definite agenda going into a meeting you will feel more able to keep the conversation on track and not let emotional or trivial discussions cloud your program.

2. Always dress well if you are meeting a person or people who may intimidate you. Feeling good about yourself lifts your self esteem. Power dressing was the catch cry of women of the late eighties and early nineties. For good reason, these women were trying to break into areas in business that were not generally open to women. Their appearance was part of their identity at that time. The same rings true today, if you want to be taken seriously, dress seriously. It does not matter what the meeting is, dress well and appropriately. It will give you confidence and will let the other people know you are someone to be taken seriously.

3. Learn to hold yourself with confidence. This may take a little practice but is worthwhile. Check out any CEO or politician and watch the way they move and hold themselves. Start by pulling your shoulders back and down and your stomach in. To get your shoulders back just roll your arms forward so that the elbows are facing back, this pushes your shoulder blades back. It also has the added benefit of leaving your arms and palms facing forward. If you are a hand talker, practice not doing this unless the situation actually calls for you to describe something with your hands.

4. Lastly, it is really important to think before you speak. Again, practice this, at work, with your kids, friends, shop keepers, anyone. Take a moment, formulate what you want to say, then say it. Just because someone else says something does not mean you have to answer straight away. If you are in court or with a mediator or some other professional and feel yourself becoming over whelmed ask for a moment. This is perfectly reasonable and is done all the time. The professionals would much prefer you to be communicating rationally and unemotionally than getting flustered and saying whatever pops in your head.

Divorce is difficult enough without being treated in a way you do not want to be. Follow the above rules and see the difference.

See original: How To Behave While Going Through A Divorce

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