Simple Divorce Advice

Too many people reach the point where they want a divorce yet still find themselves married years down the track.
They have engaged lawyers, often many, wrangled over details, needed to resubmit documentation because details get old, and never seem to find common ground where negotiation is an option.
The threat of court is always hanging over their heads, yet the thought of court, the cost and emotional trauma, puts both of them off ever actually taking that step. So they just keep arguing over the same details for years as their lives pass them by, their health often deteriorates, their children grow up with the worst possible role models and they stay unexplainably stuck together.
The conversation is always the same, ‘I just want to get on with my life’ ‘I’m not settling for less than …..’ WHY?
Usually there is a percentage of the whole that is a given and it is the last ten percent that these people are arguing about. Ten percent of all issues, it may be money or assets or it may be children on Friday afternoons, it is still ten percent and keeping them locked together.
It is at this point that both parties must look inward and ask themselves exactly what they are getting out of this.
A few questions to ask
• Am I afraid to move on alone?
• Do I want to hurt my ex?
• Do I still have feelings for my ex?
• How could these feeling turn into such bad behavior?
• Why do I care so much about this ten percent?
• Why will I not give in so I can move on?
• How much am I hurting my children with this ongoing battle?
• Why is the battle more important than the children?
• How much money have I wasted on ten percent?
• How much money will I waste on ten percent?
• How much money could I make if I used any settlement to move forward?
• How much more of this can my health take?
• Why am I sacrificing my life for ten percent?

For those that remain married after deciding to divorce because you cannot agree on a settlement, you are wasting your lives and your health to win a point that ultimately does not matter.
Living your life to the full, loving your children and creating happiness is the best we can ask for. Ten percent is not worth sacrificing this for.

Originally posted: Once You Decide To Divorce – Don’t Stay Married For Ever

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