Simple Divorce Advice

When you see a happy couple together, arm in arm, smiling and affectionate a part of you feels envious, even jealous as to why you can’t have that. Little do you know, little do you see what goes on behind closed doors.
No relationship is perfect and no relationship works for years on end without equal effort from both partners. There are multiple theories about what makes a great relationship. There is an endless list of what to do and what not to do. Some believe that women have a tendency to try to change men whilst some believe men remain commitment conscious even after marriage. These are all fallacies.
There are just as many men trying to change women and just as many women that are commitment conscious after marriage. Simply the stereotypes no longer apply. Since this is the case, how can you recover from a break up or even consider carrying on with the hope of one day entering into another relationship, let alone marriage.
The answer is actually rather simple. Know who you are and what you want, from yourself and your partner. Then ask yourself the question – when are you going to forgive you?
The reason why we have relationships that mirror the one before is because we are carrying the same beliefs with us however, expecting a different result. Some believe that there is a lesson to be learned and you haven’t learned it yet.
Most of the time relationships failure and marriages dissolve because of each person’s issues and/or often termed baggage. We take this with us into each relationship and expect it to sit quietly under the carpet until something happens where our buttons are pushed and the same issue arises.
The question is are you prepared to work on this for yourself so that the next time you choose to enter a relationship it will be on terms that represent who you are today, not who you were five years, ten years ago or last year because you decided that you would never forgive yourself for the hurt that you caused? Yes, you because the partner that is long gone isn’t suffering from your beliefs and they are not carrying the pain of what happened, you are. Consequently you blame yourself and kindly create additional beliefs around this to support that you should continue to suffer.
Of course there is a part of you that finds this absolutely ridiculous and it is this part that allows you to let go and create the relationship with yourself first which in turn enables you to have a healthy relationship with someone else.
The happy couple that you see are happy not because they are perfect or that they ignore issues, they are happy because they know who they are and they accept themselves; forgive themselves and have enabled themselves to move forward without this.
To remove your beliefs that are holding you back start with the simplest step – forgive yourself irrelevant of what has happened. Then allow yourself to see yourself for who you are without the baggage you have been carrying around.
It is then that you are ready to have a happy relationship with you.
Hally Rhiannon-Nammu
Power Life Coach / Spiritual Healer of Creative Balance
International Author / Speaker
www.creativebalance.com.au
Written by: Hally Rhiannon-Nammu – copyright 2011

Excerpt from: The Happy Couple, is it possible?

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